If you put me in an elevator with another very social person, we're going to meet everyone in that elevator. "Hey, how's it going?" Meanwhile, the quieter people in there are thinking, "I'm trapped in here with talkers."
That's harmless in an elevator. In sales, it costs you deals. Most salespeople sell the way they'd want to be sold to. They pitch in their own world, at their own speed and in their own style, then wonder why the buyer went quiet.
The best salespeople do something different. They acclimate to the buyer's world first.
Most sales training starts in the wrong place
A lot of sales training hands everyone the same script. Same opener, same questions, same close. Somebody wrote that script, and it fits buyers who think like that somebody. Everyone else hears a pitch.
Our sales program, ACCLIMATE, is built on three words instead: You, They, Us. Start with yourself, learn their world, then build the next step together.
Know how you naturally communicate.
Understand the buyer’s pace, needs and concerns.
Find the way of working that connects both of you.
You: know how you sell
Every seller has a natural style, and it comes straight from their drives.
Sellers with high extraversion persuade with energy and connection. Their risk is over-promising. They want everyone happy, they find it hard to say no, and they leave a meeting having agreed to things the team can't deliver.
Sellers with high dominance persuade with boldness and confidence. To them, no is a speed bump on the way to yes. Their risk is pushing a buyer who needs time.
Sellers with high formality persuade with preparation and detail. Their risk is waiting too long to ask for the business.
Sellers with high patience build trust steadily, and clients tend to stay with them. Their risk is letting a deal drift because they don't want to rush anyone.
And if you think you're too introverted to sell, let me ask you this. You might think you're an introvert. But what if you're just a low extrovert? Some of the best sellers I know are quiet. They listen better, prepare better and follow up better.
Most salespeople sell the way they'd want to be sold to.
The over-promise trap
That first risk deserves its own minute, because it costs more than lost deals. It costs trust.
Sellers who want everyone happy say yes in the room. Yes, we can do that. Yes, by Friday. Yes, I'll send it tonight. Then they get back to the office and wonder what they just agreed to.
The fix is a simple system. Write down every promise you make during the meeting. Read them back to the buyer before you leave. Send them in writing within a day. If something on the list can't be done, you'll find out while the buyer still trusts you, instead of after.
They: learn their world before you pitch
The second step is the buyer's world. On the practical side, that means research, preparation and a real pipeline, so you're moving people from suspects to prospects on purpose.
A suspect is anyone who might buy. A prospect is someone you've researched, who has a real need, and who you know how to reach. Most pipelines are full of suspects. Turning them into prospects is work you do before the first call, not during it.
On the people side, it means reading how the buyer is wired. You can learn a lot before you ever meet. How long are their emails? How fast do they reply? Do they ask about results, or about process? Do they bring other people to the meeting, or come alone? Each answer is a clue.
The same four drives apply.
- Does this buyer want control and options, or reassurance and support?
- Do they want to chat first, or get straight to substance?
- Do they decide fast, or do they need a clear process and some time?
- Do they want the headline, or the details and the fine print?
Think about the buyer who says, "I'd like to think about it." For a buyer with high patience, that isn't a no. It's how they decide. Give them a clear process and a date to talk again. For a buyer who wants to move today, the same sentence usually means something is missing. Find out what it is.
Us: build the next step together
The third step is where your approach meets their needs. You connect what you do to what they actually care about. You ask for the business in a way that fits how they decide. And once you've done good work, you ask for referrals.
Referrals follow the same rule. The best time to ask is right after the client sees a result, while it's fresh. Make it easy for them: ask who else they know who's dealing with the same problem, and offer to send something they can forward.
This is the opposite of a hard close. You're not pulling them into your world. You've walked into theirs, and you're building the next step from there.
You can see how one ask lands differently with each drive in the "Asking for the sale" example on our Drives page.
Acclimate to their world first.
Coach each seller the way they're wired
Sales managers make the same mistake leaders make everywhere. They coach every seller the same way, usually the way they like to be coached themselves.
Start with an objective picture of what your team can do. Our Selling Skills Assessment is built for exactly that: understand the strengths, focus the training and support your people.
Then coach to each person's drives:
- Help your high-extraversion sellers build a follow-up system and practice saying no.
- Help your high-dominance sellers slow down and listen when a buyer needs time.
- Help your high-formality sellers ask for the business sooner.
- Help your high-patience sellers bring a little urgency to the close.
Same standard for everyone. Different coaching for each person.
The same thinking applies when you hire sellers. Not every sales role is the same. Some need someone who can close on the first visit. Others need someone who builds relationships over months. A seller who has to fake the role every day won't last, no matter how well they interview. Hire for the role first.
One exercise for your next sales meeting
Ask every seller to pick their three most important prospects. For each one, they write down three things:
- How does this buyer like information: bullet points or paragraphs?
- How fast do they decide, and who else is involved?
- What does a next step look like in their world, not ours?
Then plan the next conversation from there.
If you'd like help building this into your team, ACCLIMATE runs as a full day in week one and a half day in week two, in person, on Zoom or hybrid. And if you want to start with your own style, the free six-minute assessment shows how you're wired. I'll walk you through your results myself.
Sell in their world first.
Questions readers ask
Start with an objective picture of each seller's skills, then coach to how each person is wired. Keep one standard for the whole team, and give each seller the coaching that fits them.
The framework behind ACCLIMATE, HumanLytics' sales program. You: know how you sell. They: learn the buyer's world before you pitch. Us: build the next step together, ask for the business and earn referrals.
Yes. Sellers with lower extraversion often prepare better, listen better and follow up better. You might think you're an introvert. But what if you're just a low extrovert?
A full day in week one and a half day in week two, with practical assignments in between. It runs in person, on Zoom or hybrid.
Mike McCloskey
Founder and CEO of HumanLytics Team. Helping leaders turn people data into a people plan.
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